I sometimes cry to deal with my pain.
I cry knowing that I miss him.
I cry watching my daughter grow up without her daddy.
I was driving around, running errands, going about my day not even realizing the emotions that were brewing inside of me. As I passed by things that reminded me of him, I started to cry. Tears rolled down my face uncontrollably and my heart began to beat fast.
I don't know why he was taken away from me with no warning; no time to process what was happening. Without the closure that I seek, my heart is still filled with pain. I talk to God and ask him why; knowing I may never have the reason behind my loss. I also know I have to learn to be okay with that.
The truth is...
I'm not okay (some of the time). However, I am strengthened by my desire to help women appreciate their role as a wife; supporting them in being a better wife. My loss empowered me to give to you.
So, I challenge you on this day, the first day of a new year, the opportunity for new beginnings to love your husband like you've never loved him before.
I challenge you to make a commitment to change YOU, not him.
You will find that when you focus on how you can become a better wife, it will in turn make him a better husband.
I challenge you to take a moment and reflect on your marriage; appreciating the bitter and the sweet. You have to know that TODAY is your opportunity to be the best wife. Tomorrow did not come for me. While, I don't have any regrets, I often wonder if I lived up to my full wife potential (probably not).
Don't let that be your story. Eliminate the need to be right and implement the need to love, unconditionally. Do all that you can do, love as hard as you can love and give all you can give to your spouse.
This, I believe, is truly what it means to be a wife, having no regrets.